They attacc, they protecc, but most importantly, they relaccccccc.
"Bring me my scotch."
Instagram: @mallophaga
"Wait, is Meryl ACTUALLY gonna be on Big Little Lies?!"
Instagram: @adorabull
"Jeez, you drive like an escaped felon, Richard!"
Instagram: @allizzent
"Shit! Is it my turn to pick the kids up from school?"
Instagram: @teekafraser
"Cheryl, I know you wanted to spice things up in the bedroom, but THIS?!?!?!"
Instagram: @coupleofcockers_
"All that's ever on the news these days is incoherent barking."
Instagram: @caitlinsok
*Drags cigarette* "The company is downsizing and the first division they're making cuts to is — you guessed it — sales."
Instagram: @bugandpennypugparty
"I brought orange slices for halftime for the little soccer stars!"
Instagram: @swijnen
"If I'm being totally honest, I'm a little worried about your excessive butt-sniffing, Denise."
Instagram: @danelifewith_kumah_and_nala
"This episode of Black Mirror is getting too real..."
Instagram: @thelauraaurora
"When will my husband return from war?"
Instagram: @yohubbabubba
"I know the breakup's been hard man, but you gotta get back in the game."
Instagram: @notoriousruthie
"Men can be so heartless, Jessica. I need another mimosa."
Instagram: @xhellguelx
"There, there. It okay."
Instagram: @zillaandfriends
"Nothing to see here, just a man and his plushy cowboy..."
Instagram: @louie_lefrenchie_
"We'll get the assorted cheese platter to start. Right, my love?"
Instagram: @monsieurcheffy
"Crackin' open a cold one with the boys, gnawing on tennis balls... This is frickin' chiiiiiiiiiiiiiiill."
Instagram: @sennathepotato
"I know this sounds silly, *girlish giggle* but I feel like I've known you forever..."
Instagram: @a__barber
"If I sees a bench, I sits."
Instagram: @taleofanomad
"You gonna pass the popcorn or what?"
Instagram: @franongram
"So what job are you hoping to get with that degree in ceramics? I think everyone here would LOVE to know."
Instagram: @lokellogg
*Listens to "A Thousand Miles" by Vanessa Carlton in a prius*
Instagram: @mburds
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